i made an animated logo for my film production company based on: (1) my Kundalini awakening + (2) the thankful discovery I wasn't possessed.
Just because you don't understand now, doesn't mean you will never understand.
A couple years ago, I was an extremely Christian mid-twenty-something who somehow found herself having a spontaneous Kundalini awakening.
When I say "extremely Christian", I mean, for example, that I was the type who wouldn't touch a crystal or do yoga because I thought all of that was idolatry... since we're throwing that stone, I might as well highlight that this explanation also satisfactorily illustrates my use of the word "spontaneous".
Feeling all this energy coursing through my body and learning about chakras all of a sudden made me scared enough to consider an appointment with a deliverance minister.
The only thing was, my life kept getting better, which didn't seem very demonic to me.
Whatever this energy was, it seemed to break through every internal block and dissolve every trauma, until the person I thought I was dissolved, and all that remained was the real me that couldn't be contained by any definition.
But the time in between, when I was still externalizing god, was a very confusing- and, like I said, scary- time for me. Also? Frustrating. Because I knew that what I was going through was important, but I couldn't understand it. It felt as if all my prayers to god were being received by "him" chewing gum- obnoxiously silent the entire time, only to be finally answered by him placing the chewed-up gunk in my hair for me to fight with and detangle alone.
I had to have faith and patience that I would be able to unpack all these codes one day and derive some reason. I had to. And with time, I did.
You know, our bodies like to organize so much information into tiny packets. I'm thinking about DNA being packaged right now, proteins....Information seems like noise when it's thrown at us; it kinda always has to be unpacked. We often tend to avoid this unpacking stage and opt to run in fear from the things we don't understand, though.
Regardless, there comes a time in each of our lives when, for whatever reason-god, our higher self, the divine, the universe- we simply aren't allowed to, anymore (run).
I was so grateful to collaborate with animator, Oelo Octoon to create the Dee Barlas Films logo, where a girl gets into a fight with a tv-chair she's stuck to because of this gum that is essentially gluing her hair to it.
(And, yeah, I realized after it was completed that being a fan of Alice in Chains since I was 13 may have unconsciously influenced my creative direction. I can't really look at it without "Angry Chair" playing in my head, now, lol...I just realized I still need to add audio to the animation, actually- like sound effects/foley....).
Anyways!
I ultimately want my films to be an energetic safe place for viewers to face the things the things they've been running from. For me to face things instead of running from them. Whether these films are understood by myself, at first or not. Or others, at first or not, I trust that whatever I explore or channel is supposed to be unpacked for a good reason.
With love,
Dee
